This world can seem very inhospitable. When you see content on social media, you end up finding comments that outright just seem hateful and spiteful. Very rarely do I come across some “viral” post that doesn’t have at least a dozen people that are just downright vicious, regardless of whether they agree or not with the post itself. It somehow feels like the world never grew up.
There is some level of authenticity that seems to be missing. When we sit behind a keyboard, what spurs us to change how we interact with others? Do we just drop a filter that we use in everyday interactions with strangers?
What are the “social lubricants” that make all the other real-life interactions go without feeling like having a meltdown by how someone else thinks?
When meeting a stranger in person, we generally nod or just say “How’s it going?”. Some of these are just general niceties, but the more we practice this with the same people, we tend to build relationships. This doesn’t inherently mean they are your best friend, but after a while you may actually find out that Walmart greeter’s name. You may find out something more about the clerk at the gas station as they feel comfortable noticing that you’re wearing their favorite band’s shirt.
All of these building blocks of finding common ground first seem the fall to the wayside online. In front of the screen, we stop having to do the interpersonal dance that happens throughout life. Those niceties may feel exhausting to some, but they are the foundational building blocks that allow us to begin to weave a fabric of social cohesion.
A colleague of mine had mentioned “stoop culture”. While it is mainly attributed to larger cities, I first-hand saw it with my neighbors. it can be alive and well, a method in which we show an “open door” social policy to those around us. It is a practice that can help invite you again to your community.
I actually just also watched a video this morning from the SubwayTakes guy. You can watch it here: https://youtube.com/shorts/vQ6TOleoCTY?feature=shared
The premise of the take is that if you move somewhere new, you should get involved. Involvement past just paying taxes – but by providing a service to your fellow neighbors and community. Soup kitchens, Big Brother Big Sister, Habitat for Humanity- there are so many ways we can give back to our communities. Maybe even start a social group…?
I’ll take it even further and say that even if you have grown up here, you should volunteer. You should be a voice of your community to those who matter, your neighbors and your neighborhood. It could be as simple as starting a walking club, a book club, or just a simple weekly get together! But the point is to be social!
I could very well be singular in this sentiment, but I don’t think I am. And I am ultimately tired of feeling lost, like I don’t have a strong social circle, in the place that I live! And I want to change that. I want to change that for the men in our community.
In an effort to create a social space within LaPorte County, I hope to help men find their place within their community. Join me in this journey to help create a new social fabric!
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